Renetta Garrison Tull - Online

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Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Making Friendship Intentional

This morning I went to http://www.gospel.com to see what topics they had for the day, including the daily Bible verse, and I ran across this article on friendship. The article talks about 4 guys who are friends in college and rather than disperse after graduation, they make a pact or a covenant to remain the best of friends and to keep each other encouraged. In other words, they made a pact to always have one another's back.
http://www.intervarsity.org/news/intervarsity-alumnifriendship-covenant
I like that.

I move a lot and I travel a lot. So I don't have a chance to do a lot of "girlfriend" things that I used to do back in the day. I miss it sometimes ... the opportunity to stop at a girlfriend's house and just plop down on the couch, kick off the shoes, and just talk. But I appreciate the strong friendships that I have and am grateful for their support.

I have one friend in New Jersey who has been "my girl" since 3rd grade! So we've gone through parent controls, wanting to rebel, trying to keep good grades up, going places where we shouldn't have been, boyfriends and the friends who are boys (there is a difference), and so many other things. Now, as adults, we've had to go through sicknesses and deaths of loved ones, sadnesses that come along with life's challenges, and trying to keep each other encouraged when things just don't go right! We also celebrate when things go well, when accomplishment are made, and when goals are met! I deeply cherish the fact that she can "hear" the unwritten inner thoughts in my texts, and "see" the unwritten expressions when I call and can tell exactly what I'm thinking. It's so funny when we're talking in code in public (since there are some things that you just can't talk about aloud when other people are around) and we always know exactly what is going on.

I have another friend who always gives me "the look" and the "the smile" especially if something isn't going my way. Her eyebrows will raise and she'll say "Ooo KAaay" ... and I know that means "get a grip" or "get yourself together" or "Yeah, right." I laugh just thinking about it. It's always good to have people who will love you and keep you in check.

This makes me think of the verse in the Bible that stresses having "good counsel." http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?book_id=23. Psalm 1 in the King James Version talks about not walking in the counsel of the ungodly. I think that the Amplified Bible's version says it the way that I feel it:
Psalm 1:1
BLESSED (HAPPY, fortunate, prosperous, and enviable) is the man who walks and lives not in the counsel of the ungodly [following their advice, their plans and purposes], nor stands [submissive and inactive] in the path where sinners walk, nor sits down [to relax and rest] where the scornful [and the mockers] gather.

For me, this means that my friends are going to have my back and they're not going to encourage me to do something that is ungodly. It's a blessing to have friends to remind you to take the high road and to have integrity at all times and in all situations. And even though these may be core values and I think that I would never do something that would be "that bad" anyway, it's good to have friends who pray for you, love you, and determine to be the human warning signs that help you not to slip. It's also a blessing to have friends who go through life with you. Life can be challenging. Unexpected "darts" can come your way. But thank God for friends who will laugh and cry with you, walk or sit with you, and hold your hand or hug you, through the ups and downs.

The best feeling of all is experiencing the happiness of a friend. When she's in love, her engagement, graduation, her wedding, the birth of a child, promotions, celebrations of goals, anniversaries, and more. There's something so special about seeing your friend smile and be genuinely happy. To all of my friends, I love you! To my sisters-in-law who have become sisters and friends, I love you! To all who are reading, may you have friends in your lives who love you too!

Dedicated to all "sista-friends," girlfriends, and acquaintances who will soon become friends.

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